Breaking Up

Breaking up is hard

 

Being dumped

If its is all over and you weren't expecting it then it can come as a terrible blow. You'll feel very vulnerable and hurt. You may try to hurt them back. If they tell you face to face then thank them for letting you know in person. Chances are you'll sound bitter no matter how you say this. Try not to cry. Try not to weep inconsolably over them begging them to change their mind. Don't threaten anything. You'd not want someone to stay with you out of fear or pity? Stay calm and work out how to get home as quick as possible and who you can ring for a chat. Although you may be best to cry on your own for a bit and get over the shock. If you have close friends then give thm a call and see if somene can come and take you home.

 

 

Going to dump someone?

I've read many times that if you're going to dump someone you should do it in an open and neutral space. That means not in their favourite restaurant, at work, or in the library. These are bad places to be dumped. Don't take them somewhere out in the middle of nowhere. You might end up stuck together on a long drive back home with each other being silent and morose. Go somewhere you both know. Make sure that there isn't anyone you know there. Its a bad idea to dump people in front of their friends. Its a small world you know. Once you've picked a good location you need to work out what to say.

 

What to say

You could start by saying its been fun ... but... and let them take it from there. Don't ever admit to having found someone else. The corny traditional things to say are: I've changed. This doesn't work for me anymore. I don't think I can see you anymore. I need to be on my own. This relationship isn't working for me. I need to get away. I'm not happy. You don't make me happy anymore. I need to be single for a while. I'm confused about what I want from life and need to take some time to find out what I want. We've grown apart. It's over. I'm sorry. The things you should never say... I've found someone else prettier/more inteligent/richer than you. I'd rather snog a dead skunk. I'm dating your best friend. I'm dating your mother/father/both. keep it simple and don't let them twist things round so that you end up still going out with them.